Wednesday, January 02, 2008

Oh Christ I`m Related To Harriet Harman

Even I occasionally find the words ,“Little Englander”, forming soundlessly on my desiccated lips . So called ‘foreign correspondents’ ,if the exist at all, do their job, reading the local Press, from London, so we were never going to get insightful; coverage of the Bhutto assassination . Ironically , however, even the implications for our “Small Island “ feel phoned in.
Did Gordon brown “articulate the feeling of us all"..or not …. Its almost as if that mystifying phenomenon of soap opera reportage had spilled into serious news. This isn’t real you want to shout , this is like…. “Wrestling “.( ITV used to beat BBC armed only with that be-spangled tosh despite the Beeb monopolising priceless Franchises from the FA Cup to Wimbledon.)
Better still has been the collective curled lip turned towards the quasi dynastic succession of (dead meat ) Bilawal . Dominic Sandbrook in the Standard got the joke . Breezing through the Chamberlains and the Churchills,of course, he alights on a new dynasty, the “Prescotts “ . It appears young David who did so nicely out of his planning permission contacts , with his Development Company, is bidding to follow his father as an MP for Hull. As Conan Doyle said “Where there is no imagination there is no horror” Unfortunately I can just about imagine it .
The nature of contemporary British nepotism is easy to miss .Cavendishes and Cecils were dominant clans of the Victorian period and as late as the 1950s Harold Macmillan’s government included 35 of his own relatives. Ah yes but we have moved on ,we murmur contentedly , but have we ?Peter Mandelsohn is the grandson of Herbert Morrison, Loony Benn and son…we know , Baroness Jay is the daughter in law of Jim Callaghan , Frances Maude and Nicholas Soames and David Heathcote Armory are their father`s sons, but this is the misleading tip of the iceberg. To get a better idea have a look at the 1997 intake . Nineteen of these were the children of MP`s but turn the magnification up on the famous Blair-babes ,and you can see the typically close familial links common to the political class
The Blair babes
Hilary Armstrong represented the same seat in Durham as her father had held before her. The Potteries MP Llin Golding sat for a seat formerly held by her husband . Her father had been a Labour MP for 30 years . Irene Adams sat for Paisley South, another seat held by her husband. Charlotte Atkins , the Staffordshire MP was the daughter of 1960s firebrand Ron Atkins. Estelle Morris was an MP`s daughter . Dari Taylor of Stockton South had grown up the daughter of the MP for Burnley. Gwyneth Dunwoody , then on her first quarter century, had been married to an MP, and her father Morgan Phillips, was General Secretary of the Labour Party.
Fiona Mac Taggart of Slough had grandparents in parliament .Ann keen , in Brentford, had a husband Alan, who represented the next door constituency of Feltham, and a sister , Sylvia Heal, who was the MP for Halesowen. Bridget Prentice , ( Lewisham East), had been married o the MP for Pendle. Julie Morgan( Cardiff North) was married to the MP for Cardiff West. Angela Eagle , ( Wallasey ) had a twin sister Maria sitting for one of the Liverpool seats ..and so on and on it goes ….
The Others
The Conservative picture looks little more meritocratic but Julie Kirk bride ,Virginia Bottomley and Ann Witherton were all married to MP`s. Ann Cryer (Keighley) deserves special mention.. She was elected to a seat once held by her husband, gave birth to Hornchurch MP John Cryer who entered in the same intake, following both parents into “Public service “ The Liberals are a little better still, but Asquiths married Bonham Carters whose son whose daughter married Joe Grimmond so they too have their Blue blood.
Interestingly it is in the Labour Party that the bloodline and family seem to be most necessary ……perhaps because they do not value merit ? No doubt the encyclopaedic Iain Dale could spend happy hours bringing you up to date on the intricate rivulets of connection between the whole lot of them , but I think the point is made …..
Cheri Blair of course comes from the Booths and her Great Great Great Grandfather's Brother's son is John Wilkes Booth the Man who shot US President Abraham Lincoln.Coo..Harriet Harmanisation is a near relative of Lord Longford and guess what, my Auntie looked us up and we are related to him as well. Harriet Harman is therefore related to me …….. Pass me the pearl handled pistol please .


Philipa said...

Harriet Harman went to Uni with PH. I wonder if she had flowers in her hair and so did he?? Now if you could source a piccy of that little moment in time N, hee hee. I wonder if they Harmanised?

Revolting thought.

Not quite as revolting as Blunkett and Kimberly Quim though.

At least Harman is fairly pretty N. If you were at Uni with her would you have er.. asked her to join you in selling the 'Socialist Worker'??

Newmania said...

I feel a bit osrry for Blunkett really P and if you think Harman is way.

You are pretty

Ed said...

When are you standing N?

Newmania said...

never Ed and now about to be horizontal

Mrs Smallprint said...

Sound like the evergreen "nature v nurture" debate to me.

Did you have to lie down when you found out the bad news?

Newmania said...

smelling salts and strong tea Mrs. S

Anonymous said...

...her Great Great Great Grandfather's Brother's son is John Wilkes Booth

Yet another interesting factoid that you've brought to my attention, Newms. Thank you.

BTW, by my reckoning, that makes John Wilkes Booth Cherie's first cousin, four times removed.

Philipa said...

Aha - now I understand Ed's comment of why he wished he'd seen that pic of me earlier, he thinks N telling me I'm pretty is a political tool to secure my vote. If you're looking for a political tool Ed, look no further than our own dear PM. Actually there's a choice in Westminster and political journalism ploughs a rich furrow ;-)

N - horizontal eh? Thanks! That's a cold shower and three hail Mary's ;-) And you feel sorry for Blunkett? He was having an affair with a married person and when he couldn't get what he wanted - the breakup of that marriage - he selfishly pursued HIS OWN 'rights' aggresively through the courts with the help of legislation he and his friends had created. So much for respecting the married family!

Newmania said...

You may have a point P

Anonymous said...

If the stretch limo with blacked out windows which pulled up outside the Queen's Head in Messing wasn't a sufficiently sinister announcement, the two, arm swinging, goons who emerged from it, unmistakably were. The shiver of death walked over barmaid Mehalah Mussett's grave at the two 6'5" yanks, wearing dark glasses and homburg hats, their fat trigger fingers twitching expectantly, stood in the lounge bar waiting to be served.

"O-ow can I 'elp ee, g-gents?", quivered Mehalah.

"We need directions to the castle, ma'm", Detective Moid Mulder replied.

"Baint no castle round 'ere", Mehalah told him, "you do know this is Messing and we be in deepest Essex?"

"YES, ma'm", we know", said Molder, hunching down closer to Mehalah, his face, leering at hers, from just an inch away.

"...scuse me asking", said Mehalah, "you gents baint English, are y....", Mehalah stopped short of finishing as two sets of expressionless eyes behind two pairs of very dark shades riveted her own eyes to the front of her tiny brain.

Still eager to help, she said: "Sure you don't mean Messing Manor? Moind though if you goo thare, gen'lmen, do be careful of them treacle mines up thare, they're treacherous. Can I get 'ee a noice point of Messing's finest to warm you gents?"

"No castle, are you SURE???"

"Oh, wait", said Mehala, as a bent penny dropped somewhere, you mean the Towers at Lay'r Marney, don't you? Now you moind you don' get blown off them towers, it's dead windy up there, moiy auntie Flo' almost fell off tham she had to toiy hersalf t....OOOH!", seeing the look of suppressed rage in Mulder's eyes, Mehalah dropped the weather forecast and united nations stuff and jumped back fromt those piercing shades. Then she added apologetically "'s jest a few few moiles droive from here".

Mulder turned his back on Mehalah and began shouting into his radio....."Moody, it's Mulver, what the goddam mother f****er? Listen we godda divert the cavalcade, yeah, you heard. No way is the Pre-si-dent to enter Messing, They're all lunatics and throwbacks here and this is the WRONG place, the Pre-si- dent should be in the Tower"

Mehalah heard a voice scream, "WHAAAAAAAAT?", over the radio, before Mulder screamed back, "How do I know what tower, I can't understand a goddam word anyone in this village says, that Flo' woman said this Paul Newman who is the Pre-si-dent's 26th cousin 5 times removed comes from Is-ling-ton in London. You musta god it wrong, numbskull, the Pre-si-dent's supposed to meet this Newman at the Tower of London.

Precariously balanced in the drafty tower of Messing's All Saints church, just 100 yards from the pub, Newmania stood among the placards he'd festooned with 'Welcome Cousins!' There were tears in his eyes as he peered through a dusty lancet window at the President's and Bliar's calvalcade which had u turned and was screeching away towards London.

"Interview of a lifetime and you messed it up, Flo...."

Anonymous said...

Which is a roundabout way of saying: you do realise that if you are related to Lord Longford, you are also related to the rest f the royal family, George Bush, Tony Bliar....and me?

My ancestors and Bush's lived in the stunning little one horse and 80 people village of Messing for many centuries and were related.

Auntie Flo'

Newmania said...

Zat so Flo...what I don`t understand is how it is that the Royal family are related to George Bush.

Most entertaining !!

Philipa said...

N, Flo, I am suffering from a derth of literary appreciation on my blog and wonder if you would add your appreciation to this post cause actually I like this poem, not only for itself but it also reminds me of 'Mediocrity in love rejected' by Thomas Carew. What say you??

Newmania said...

Will do ..P

Newmania said...

Will do ..P

Philipa said...

Ta x

Blog Archive