'A driving instructor had a 12-inch carrot in his trousers when he gave a woman a lesson, a court was told yesterday. Bespectacled Stephen Cooney, 51, put the pupil's hand on his groin to pretend that he had an erection - then took the carrot out.
'Rod Hunt, prosecuting, told Teesside Crown Court: "When you go to a driving instructor you may expect he would carry a copy of the Highway Code. You would not expect that in the glovebox of his car he had photographs of him naked, close-ups of him holding his penis and close-ups of his penis. And you would not expect a driving instructor to drive around with a 12-inch carrot down his trousers pretending he had an erection...
'"He had placed a carrot in his trouser pocket as a practical joke and he pretended he had an erection as her driving was so good"'
'Mr Cooney told the court that other nude photographs found by police in the glovebox of his Vauxhall Corsa were "practice" pictures. He had received a digital camera for his 50th birthday from his partner last October and took close-up snaps of his penis to test it out.
'"I was trying close-up photography," he told the jury. "Once you have taken the photos you analyse them not so much for the subject, but the quality."
'Mr Cooney admitted putting a carrot in his pocket and telling his pupil her perfectly-executed manoeuvre had given him an erection, but said he did not make her touch him after pointing out the bulge' - The Northern Echo.
7 comments:
Obviously the man is a tosser and is a crouton short of a full salad.
He should be axed.
i don't know if you have the same problem...but in the states we have flashers every now and then...i remember on my 18th birthday, out with my girlfriends...a man decided it was time to share his "wares" as they were...my best friend was still a virgin and traumatized...i looked at him and told him he should put that little thing away before it froze and fell off...apparently it was not the reaction he wanted...yes i have always been a bit outspoken...
Daisy - hilarious story. Sadly I was accosted on the bus at 16 yrs old and the man held a knife in my ribs. I sat terrified until two men got on the bus near us (myself and the attacker) and I took a chance and dropped my purse on the floor, they picked it up and I was allowed to get it - I dived practically on their lap and told them I was being threatened and thank God they protected me - the attacker quickly got off the bus and ran. The men offered to walk me around town but I was too shaken to be polite and just headed for the nearest coffee shop. Spookily my friend was sexually assaulted that same week by a man in the same town. She's never been a wet lettuce and was outspoken but it shook her up.
I like Raincoasters tale - she was unfortunately attacked recently and kicked the shit out of her attacker!
That reminds me of the story about the Prime Minister who puts a white flag and poison capsule in his pocket before every PMQs. Perhaps that's why he shook so violently and visibly during Cameron's relentlessly clever onslaught this week?
Poor old Gordon, I almost felt sorry for him - until I remembered the misery he's inflicted on my country. Broon is petrified of Cameron.
I don't know what's more painful to watch, Gordon publicly dying the death of a thousand cuts every week or the misery on the faces of the entire nulab benches as it sinks in that they are led by a dead parrot.
Go, Cameron! you are doing an ace job on jelly man.
As Dizzy's retrospective video pointed out, this is all too horribly reminiscent of Blair slashing Major's jugular week after week.
Guido has an ace filmed close up of poor old Gordon shaking like a watery blancmange.
Accept it, Mr One World Order, you can't take the cut and thrust of the real world, you are done for. Isn't it time you put yourself out of your misery?
Auntie Flo'
philipa...i was sorry to hear about your experience...i wonder sometimes what gives people the right to think they can lord over others...it has always been something i didnt "get"...i have usually been able to defend myself in most situations without help...but i would never take that and actually attack someone for no reason but personal gain...it just never made sense to me...stay safe...
Flo , I must say that is getting really unterest8ng isn`t it .
Daisy and P. My cousins were flashed at on their way to cricket practice( Herts Ladies). The chap thought it was a good idea to poke his appendage through the Park railings.
Sally administered a sharp cover drive and I`m told the scream could be heard for miles !
sally sounds like someone i would like to see in action...good on her...
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