Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Golden Brown

Couldn`t get that old Stranglers song off my mind on the train home ..sorry ..any better ideas?

Gordon Brown taxes for fun
Rumplstiltskin left less un-spun
Bambi was drowned
Won`t make a sound
Never around
With Gordon Brown

Cash for honours , Gordons aghast
All those years and he never asked
From whence it came
Blair took the blame
He can`t be found
Just Gordon Brown

Gordon Brown ,of clunking fist
Never was, a Socialist
Ten years of spend
That was his friend
Put underground
By Gordon Brown

Everything the same as it was
But we don`t mind too much because
Snowball is dead
Napoleon’s head
Recently crowned
King Gordon Brown

Gordon Brown, British as beef
From the English he is a thief
If you’re a Scot
You get the lot
Billions of pounds
From Gordon Brown


Anonymous said...

Cash for honours , Gordons aghast
All those years and he never asked


Here's another:

They asked me how I knew
Gordon Broon's untrue
I of course replied
Vomit here inside, cannot be denied

I said someday you'll find
All who love are blind
When your heart's on fire
You must realize
Smoke screens get in your eyes

So they chaffed me and they gaily laughed
To think I could doubt their love
Yet today their love has flown away
They're soon without their love

Now laughing I deride
Tears they can not hide
So I smile and say
When a old flame lies
Smoke screens get in your eyes

Smoke screens get in your eyes

Auntie Flo'

Anonymous said...

OH YES! I’m the great pretender (ooh ooh)
Pretending I’m doing well (ooh ooh)
Broon's need is such I pretend too much
I’m mad...but, sshh, no one can tell

OH YES! I’m the great pretender (ooh ooh)
Adrift in a world of my own (ooh ooh)
I play a game, every day the same
...Oh, don't leave me to dream all alone

Too real is this feeling of make believe
Too real when I feel what my spin can’t conceal

OOH YES! I’m the great pretender (ooh ooh)
Laughing and gay like a clown (ooh ooh)
I seem to be what I’m NOT (you see)
Just biding my time for the crown
Pretending I'm not Gordon Brown

Too real is this feeling of make believe
Too real when I feel what my spin can’t conceal

OH YES! I’m the great pretender

Auntie Flo'

Newmania said...

Clap clap clap ...I love the brackets and the (oooo)

Mermaid of Moorgate said...

THis is a brilliant blog and some top-notch comments! ha ha ha!

Newmania said...

Yippee .... YOu have made some incisive observations MM..IMHO. I wonder does everyone know what a brain box you are .

Nick Drew said...

Don't start me Mr Mania - or put it onto Moderation if you do

HG has already provoked me today

(but I liked yours: and Flo shows promise too)

Gus A said...

from elsewhere..."Was it you three that vandalised the Blue Peter garden ?"

Made me laugh. Almost tempted to add you to my blogroll for that

Newmania said...

But not quite eh ?

Travis Bickle said...

Jilted John had it right 30 years ago

Philipa said...

Aww I love sparring wid choo N but on the lighter side both you and A.Flo don't dissapoint - hilarious

well it would be if there wasn't so much truth in it. All that and he's still the best option ;-))

Newmania said...

And how I would love to wrestle you to the floor and pin you into an impossible position P ...metaphorically speaking of course

Newmania said...

,,,Travis I had to think for about 10 seconds before I laughed at that

Just cus he`s better looking than me , just cus he`s cool and trendy ? But I know ....

Philipa said...

Sorry, must clarify: on the serious and darker side y'all don't disappoint either. You can wrestle me to the floor anytime and frequently do N - I wish I could write like you.

Can't wait for the Tory conference:

I'm too decent for my tie,
too worthy for my tie..

Newmania said...

So worthy it hurts ....

Anonymous said...

Carnal knowledge...I've been wondering if Gordon has been reinvented and given body language and speech presentation lessons by Bill Clinton or, more likely, one of his aides. Isn't that partly what Clinton was hinting at during his speech at the last nulab conference?

Watch out for Brown to try to copy the Clinton thumb - he's already had a go, dismal attempt it was too. No matter how hard he tries, poor old Jimmy's own - very revealing - body language and the subconscious compulsions underlying it creeps in. He just cannot keep the lid on his compulsions for long. Just wait until the nulab honeymoon's over and he's under pressure, he's going to be hilarious when the learned responses begin to unravel :)

How do I get from Carnal knowledge to Clinton? Well, aside from the obvious explanation, the secret of Clinton's charisma and prowess as a speech maker has been said to be his ability to have carnal knowledge (presumably tantric?) with each individual in his audience.

Lord help us if old Jimmy gets any ideas along those lines, since his idea of carnal is probably a good old nose pick. Yuck! Too disgusting to even think about that.


I've copied this posting of mine over from Boris's website because to link it up with an article in the Times today...which I'm just about to find and post...I hope

Auntie Flo'

Anonymous said...

Excellent piece from today's Times by Philip Webster, Political Editor, and Sam Coates

"Read the blog which broke the story - Comment Central

Gordon Brown was accused last night of rehashing old phrases from Bill Clinton and Al Gore without attribution in his first speech to a Labour conference as Prime Minister.

An analysis by The Times has found strong similarities in both words and structure between Monday’s address and speeches made by the two Americans – both former clients of Mr Brown’s close adviser Bob Shrum.

It suggests that Mr Brown’s recent attempts to appeal as a prime minister who rejects spin have been crafted, at least in part, by one of America’s highest-paid political advertising and speech consultants.

The study by The Times Online’s Comment Central shows a marked similarity between parts of Mr Brown’s speech and big set-piece speeches of Democrat leaders.

They include:

–– Mr Brown: “Sometimes people say I am too serious and I fight too hard and maybe that’s true”;

and Al Gore’s 2000 presidential nomination acceptance speech :
“I know my own imperfections. I know that sometimes people say I’m too serious, that I talk too much substance and policy.”

–– Mr Brown: “This is my pledge to the British people: I will not let you down;”

and Al Gore’s 2000 nomination acceptance speech: “I pledge to you tonight: I will work for you"

–– Mr Brown: “This is my pledge to the British people: I will not let you down;”

and Al Gore’s 2000 nomination acceptance speech: “I pledge to you tonight: I will work for you every day and I will never let you down.”

–– Mr Brown said: “This is the century where our country cannot afford to waste the talents of anyone”;

and Bill Clinton’s State of the Union address in 1995 : “As we move into this next century, everybody matters; we don't have a person to waste.

–– ”Mr Brown: “This is my pledge to the British people: I will not let you down”;

and Al Gore’s 2000 nomination acceptance speech: “I pledge to you tonight: I will work for you every day and I will never let you down.”

Mr Brown also closely followed Mr Shrum’s speeches in structure. They often begin with a story about the candidate’s mother and father and what they taught him. Mr Brown did that on Monday.

He also drew attention to John Smeaton, the Glasgow bomb hero, in his audience on Monday, a move that has become a standard feature of a State of the Union address. Referring to soldiers as the pride of Britain echoed Colin Powell’s description of soldiers as the pride of America.

A senior Democrat strategist involved in previous presidential campaigns also noted the clear parallels with the speeches of John Kerry, the 2004 Democratic presidential candidate , and Ted Kennedy, both of whom worked with Mr Shrum.

The strategists pointed to Gordon Brown’s use of the phrase “let us be clear”. “That’s in every one of Kennedy’s speeches written by Shrum.” They added that other devices, such as the use of lessons learnt from parents and balancing work and family, were also frequently employed by both Kerry and Kennedy.

Mr Shrum, who was regularly seen around Downing St in the lead-up to the conference speech, is admired among Democrats BUT HE HAS NEVER WON PRESIDENTIAL CAMPAIGN.

He was used by President Clinton, although not on the 1992 and 1996 campaigns. Some cruelly ascribed Mr Kerry’s 2004 defeat to the curse of Shrum Last year Mr Shrum gave a seminar for the John Smith Institute entitled Cameron Plagiarizes Bush comparing the Tory leader’s political approach with President Bush.

According to a transcript, Mr Shrum said: “I recently had the dubious privilege of reading speeches and statements in which Cameron and his Conservative associates seek to rebrand themselves. What I read is, to a breath-taking degree, a shameless reprise of Bush’s siren song.”

Chris Grayling, a Tory frontbench spokesman, said: “We all know Gordon Brown’s announcements are reheated, and now his language seems reheated too. This destroys the myth that we are seeing a Prime Minister who has given up spin. Far from being the genuine article, he is just a copycat prime minister rehashing old material from US politicians.”

Andy Burnham, Chief Secretary to the Treasury, last night branded the report as “garbage” that had been fuelled by an “increasingly desperate Tory party”.

“Shadow Chancellor, George Osborne, promised in the same newspaper in 2004, that he would bring US-style ‘negative campaigning’ and ‘character attacks’ to British politics, he said.

“But what he needs to understand is that the British people will never respond to the politics of insidious underhand smears.” "


Capitalisation above is mine

So, it appears that wee B ruin has been taking lessons from Clinton as I suggested some months ago. How cool am I?

Auntie Flo'

Anonymous said...

Yet no matter how many long hours Broon spends in charisma master class and posing before the mirror as he practices his lessons, he'll always betray himself. Which is exactly what he did at nulab's conference.

It was the eyes (eye?) that had it.

Although, as the Times suggests, Broon merrily regurgitated the spin fabricated for him, at times a horrible terror for his mortal soul took hold of the wee man.

"I'm proud to be British. I believe in British values", Broon said.

And as he said it, that one eye flickered robotically upwards to stare into the hazy, unregulated middle distance of the cerebral control centre of Big Lies.

Up there, in those labyrinthine pathways of Broon's right cerebral hemisphere, a thousand little red lights flashed "Complexity, inconsistency, no rules, NO RULES. Warning, Warning!" As a thousand well ordered wheels whirred and jammed against each other.

"And the values I was brought up with are not just what I learned; they are part of the fabric of the life I have led. Not just where I come from but the experiences that have shaped me", Broon crooned.

And up in the right middle distance flickered that one eye. "Warning, WARNING, values...Aaaaauuughhh! rules, NO RULES", the red lights flashed. He's coming, he's after me, RUN FOR IT.....Oh, no, the de'il, chaos and his black dog!"

"Aye, laddie! Ye've bin lying again.. and you forgot my rules and regulations."

"I'll keep 'em, I promise, I'll never forget again...I'll make a hundred new ones, I promise..."

I don't understand why, but Broon's red lights were flashing again when he spoke of his office being 'just yards' from where he grew up and from where he and his friends went to school.

After hs speech, alone in his bathroom gazing into the full lenght mirror Broon keeps by the bath - to reassure himself that he's not drowning when he sits in his bath wearing his goggles and trying to find the courage to wet his hair:

"Mirror, mirror on the wall,, who is the greatest PM of all? :O"

"Master, you are PM it's true, but there is one greater still than you"


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