Thursday, July 31, 2008

A Giant Leap For Personkind ?


Trim ,pouting Ms. Harperson denied that she crushed a paper cup and whispered ,“ This is my moment “, the second Brown grabbed his bucket and spade , but it will have a place in the apocrypha . With a woman, even vaguely, in charge ,Labour are discovering new territory in the way the Eskimos did when, in the 17th century, they discovered the Outer Hebrides , (to the bemusement of local crofters) . Been there ,got the tee shirt . I refer of course , to “The Lady” Mrs T ,who appears to be granted honorary man status by her leftist detractors, except when they were engaged in misogynist bating .
This sort of double standard recently re-emerged directed at that other fly ,bashing against the glass ceiling ,Hilary Clinton .Ten of thousands joined a face book group called ,‘Hilary Clinton stop running for President and make me a sandwich’. If we are honest some of the sneers directed at the Harridan are not much better.( Not that that will stop me ).

So women then , what do we make of them , what about this feminist thing ? I suggest that there are two divergent forces acting in society and what I have not yet seen is any one making the reasoned speculation that they are connected . I intend to discuss just that in sinewy masculine prose

.First let us capture the spirit of pre-post-feminism.To do so we must adjourn to the court of Queen Toynbee who quotes smouldering sensuous Erica Jong with approval ,…“ 68-75..it seemed that everything would change for women …Then came the backlash. We were declared dead before we were even half born. The backlash has lasted longer than the brief flaring of feminism itself “.
Well preserved and coyly seductive Poly Toynbee locates the attack on women as starting in infancy with the “Pink disease”,….. ”It is impossible to buy toys now that are putridly pink branded or aggressively superhero male ..everything Barbie Bratz, Princess Tiaras fairy and ballerina dressing up pink pink everywhere and it damages girl’s brains …”. she continues on pornificaton….” How can it be that lap dancing is proliferating as a socially acceptable entertainment “. You will imagine that the solitary marble to which I cling has finally eluded me ,when I say I think Polly is onto something here.
I can also go along with gorgeous leggy brunette Kira Cochran ,the Guardian woman’s editor ,when she says that ironic sexism is usually not ironic . The “Retro-sexual guide to how to be a real man” is , ,in my humble opinion, on the right side of the line .“ Still mincing along to book clubs thinking you are going to pull the quiet one whose a screamer in the sack?” it says . On the other hand ‘I can’t believe I `m still single’, an example of “Frartire” says ( humorously), men are “ wired to smash a woman on the head with a bone drag her unconscious body by the hair to our apartments by the hair and fuck her”. To me this tone has become aggressive and unpleasant. It is a symptom moreover of a sly war on women operating beneath the public radar
There are exceptions to the Loaded /FHM zeitgeist .Male make up is about to sold at Super Drug , including “Guy-liner” ,the infamous Heido Fleiis is trying to open a brothel for women, and a survey by Brillcream reported that men were now far happier ironing than mending the car. These are shallow snippets of a metro sexual culture largely invented by the media .More typically ,Jordan’s little sister has got her mum to save up to buy her tooth veneers and a boob job, so she can be a glamour model like her heroine . She is fifteen and I do not like it .
So why are men treating woman so badly and women adopting sexualised roles . Well men are under sustained legal attack and women are now explicitly favoured . We know the perverse results of Maternity leave , and Harman is quiet clearly heading for a quota system by introducing the right to discriminate against men for jobs . In court women can now get away with murdering a man in his sleep by claiming “ fear of serious violence” , but a man cannot claim any diminished responsibility from jealous rage, or sudden provocation . The divorce courts continue to transfer to women the entirety of whatever they couple have built and whatever a weeping Batman says about it . The prize for divorce is the children ,a home and an income the woman no longer has to work for . This inserts a damaging power imbalance to the private sphere.
Meanwhile women remain highly resistant to marrying beneath themselves, and 75% of the dears who co-habit still want to get married . The female sole bread winner household appears to be simply unwanted by anyone ,being no more common now than 30 years ago. This of course puts great pressure on men to be a 1930s style provider when women want noughties style special treatment, in their efforts to out compete men in the workplace . True, women occupy many low paid part time jobs, but they are also pouring into the professions , outperforming men academically, and soon , no doubt , financially .
I am looking at a cutting and it is of a piece by Yvonne Roberts defending the quotas of women and speculating on how Joe Bloggs and his family might feel about his unemployment due to women quotas needing to be met. She sees the future as men becoming more like women ,and being prepared to accept a more female work/nurturing role . Well it is far from clear that women want us to do that but her final sentence is chilling.
“ Government has to restore the meaning of the word “ choice “ for fathers and mother. For some men that may mean a period of adjustment , which might hurt- but it will hurt less if they can see the reason for it “
I appear to have scribbled underneath this “ Cow !!“.Not my finest moment , and I am sorry . I mention it as a demonstration that even a reasonable and modern chap like me feel , at times , pushed , controlled and emasculated by the legislative assault on our gender. We are told to be mother , father provider , stander aside , that we are guilty from birth destructive and redundant . Beneath the public post feminist concensus men are rebelling sometimes in ugly ways .

19 comments:

Nick Drew said...

Perhaps, but then again perhaps not - no-one will thank you for stating too much plain Truth in this neck of the woods

I suggest you stick to sly humour !

Raedwald said...

There's an old boaty aphorism that goes 'if it floats, flies or fucks it's cheaper to rent than own'. And there's the rub. Marriage won't catch on again until the financial relationship changes.

For a young professional bloke, the option of keeping his money and his property investment to himself, buying lots of expensive toys and taking modern freely available opportunities for sex when he's in the mood without any of the commitments is an attractive one.

A third of dwellings in London are occupied by single people and lots of them are quite happy. The south-east's property shortage could be solved overnight if London's single blokes were forced to take a live-in concubine (or rent boy, if they're that way inclined).

The zeitgeist is all about self; self at the expense of others. This truly is the 'me' age. One hears time after time the utterly vacuous claim that 'I've got a right to be happy'. And the more Harman and her like push to distort employment markets in favour of women, the more men will quietly establish their competitive advantage and the more women will be treated as hedonistic commodities.

Newmania said...

'I've got a right to be happy'.

...and what a shallow meaningless ambition that is anyway.I`m not sure R , I don`t think we can go back to an imagined 1950s either.I always look for ways not to throw out the baby with the bath-water which we seem to have done

Philipa said...

Plain truth? Bollocks! (and I've more of them than most of the blokes I've dated)

Let's take it bit by bit and start by my stating that Polly is indeed on to something there..

Jordan’s little sister has got her mum to save up to buy her tooth veneers and a boob job, so she can be a glamour model like her heroine . She is fifteen and I do not like it

No neither do I but she has seen her sister become rich and independant by working this society we live in. Far more constructive to her I guess than sitting at home blogging about how terrible things are - Jordan's a millionaire! Money is security.

So why are men treating woman so badly and women adopting sexualised roles

They always have, dear.

Well men are under sustained legal attack and women are now explicitly favoured

Nope, they just don't like the change in their misogynist world such as losing the ability to hit, rape and lock their wives in a nuthouse when it suits them, maybe?

Brillcream reported that men were now far happier ironing than mending the car

Well I'm not, I'd rather mend the car than do the bloody ironing. I'm always amazed at the assumptions of men that 'cause I have breasts I like doing this shit. And I f---ing hate washing up.

The prize for divorce is the children ,a home and an income the woman no longer has to work for . This inserts a damaging power imbalance to the private sphere

Often the prize for divorce is running a home and family on your own, without your husbands help and support, while he makes promises and breaks them and spends his time and the money the law can't drag out of him for his own children on the first tart (or two) that he comes across.

This of course puts great pressure on men to be a 1930s style provider when women want noughties style special treatment, in their efforts to out compete men in the workplace

"out compete"?? In the workplace women wanted equal recognition for doing an equal (if not better) job. Some leftist female politician may speak for the leftist female politicians she knows but seems conveniently unaware of what the suffragette movement was all about.

True, women occupy many low paid part time jobs, but they are also pouring into the professions , outperforming men academically, and soon , no doubt , financially

Pouring into the professions and outperforming men? And this is a bad thing and should be stopped should it, Paul? Hmmm

I appear to have scribbled underneath this “ Cow !!“.Not my finest moment , and I am sorry . I mention it as a demonstration that even a reasonable and modern chap like me feel , at times , pushed , controlled and emasculated by the legislative assault on our gender. We are told to be mother , father provider , stander aside , that we are guilty from birth destructive and redundant . Beneath the public post feminist concensus men are rebelling sometimes in ugly ways

Get over it, we've had to, for generations.

Newmania said...

1 And if she had seen her sister become a whore would that be ok ?
2 No I disagree surely you have noticed the acceptance of pornography into the mainstream for example . You approve ?
3 P women are favoured though Harman`s latest explicity agreed men could be discriminated against
4 Divorce -? What possible further advantage could women have ?Of course if people are outside the law thats bad but a different subject


Tell me Phllipa , if you got what you wanted and men were semi female often relying on the woman to provide for them. Would you be happy , would you like such a man?

Philipa said...

My personal opinions then:

1 And if she had seen her sister become a whore would that be ok ?

Not in my book no, but it would be predictable that her sister would want to copy Jordan's path to security through riches in the same way.

2 No I disagree surely you have noticed the acceptance of pornography into the mainstream for example . You approve ?

No I don't approve, but neither do I blame the womens movement for the existence of pornography. There has always been pornography and the acceptance of it in the mainstream cannot be blamed on suffragettes or the womens movement for equal pay in the workplace. These things are seperate issues and should not be confused. That they are confused is not womens fault.

3 P women are favoured though Harman`s latest explicity agreed men could be discriminated against

If you check out Blue eye's blog you will see that I don't agree with the changes in the law I think you speak of - Harriet Harman does not speak for all women. I'm sure I don't either but I try to reflect the historical viewpoint, unless specifically noted otherwise, rather than second guess What Women Want, and I guess I've got a more grounded view of womens issues than someone in Westminster with their head up the PM's arse.

4 Divorce -? What possible further advantage could women have ?Of course if people are outside the law thats bad but a different subject

Women could more easily rid themselves and their children of an abusive father/husband - at the moment, due to 'fathers rights', it is very very difficult to do this in law with any degree of protection.

Tell me Phllipa , if you got what you wanted and men were semi female often relying on the woman to provide for them. Would you be happy , would you like such a man?

You assume that I want men to be "semi female" when you should know perfectly well that's not the case. Tell me any man, Paul, any man you know or have suspected I found attractive that is "semi female". I just don't want to be bullied or treated like I'm 'less than'.

I'm not.

Newmania said...

Interesting Phillipa , well I am certainly am not anti woman but I think what I am suggesting is that if women wasn't a man`s role then they will forfeit the old civil protections that you might call a sense of chivalry. Men will tend to behave aggressively and callously.

I am not sure I agree with you that the loosening of social mores has not been responsible both for freedom for women and for their sexualisation and objectification by men.It is connected if not in an obvious way.

Newmania said...

PS Raedwald is lot more pessimistic than I feel,I was just noticing the oddly different directions in which we are moving.

Newmania said...

PS Raedwald is lot more pessimistic than I feel,I was just noticing the oddly different directions in which we are moving.

Philipa said...

It is connected by men, dear heart, and shouldn't be. What I mean is that because women get the vote and equal pay for the same labour that should not equate to an erosion of manners. Sadly I think you are correct that it often does in some mens minds.

It seems some men are only happy to extend kindness and benificence to slaves, not to social equals whose position they resent.

Philipa said...

PS: I agree with your response to Raedwald, Paul, but sadly I think he makes a very valid comment.

Anonymous said...

My rather eccentric childhood left me with little time for feminism.

My mother was Maggie Thatcher's mini alter ego. She spent her childhood brutally beating up boys, her teenage years driving an ambulance through the blitz and her entire womanhood running her own businesses while demanding the world in general, and men in particular obey her every whim.

Yet, just like Maggie, she was beautiful and alluringly feminine. She drove lorries and rode motorbikes in a cloud of Channel, wearing what seemed to be 6" heels with her bouffant hair immaturely coiffured and a face rather like Marylyn Monroe's.

Thankfully, my mother married an artist who was quite happy to allow her to take care of all the sordid and tough stuff of life for him because he wasn't good at that stuff and all he wanted to do was paint.

Yet my dad had only to bat his eye lashes at my mum and she was transformed into his slave. My parents were totally equal in their complimentary roles, though very different in their abilities.

Having grown up in a family where mum did the tough stuff and was the main breadwinner and dad did the pretty stuff, I could never get my head around feminism or the need for it.

Never really had any doubt that I could achieve whatever I wanted to because that was what women did, always saw males and females as equal and never felt constrained by my gender. I never felt one of the weaker sex.

I feel exactly the same about disability. My deafness, which began in my early teens, or maybe in my childhood (unrecognised thanks to my ace lip reading) has never held me back because I wasn't allowed to see it as any sort of disability or constraint on my life.

My mother said: how can you be deaf? No one in our family's ever been deaf. Pull yourself together. So I did.

And I thank my lucky stars that I was made to get on with it, because I've seen the lives and confidence of deaf friends of mine - whose families' response to their deafness was coddling and positive discrimination - totally ruined by that.

One of my deaf friends, a very clever bloke, rarely leaves his home and is too depressed, nervous and lazy to work because of the endless accommodations his family have always made for his deafness.

Women like Harperson who make a very good living out of exploiting and creating phoney divisions by making men and women feel mutually inadequate and hostile should have their mouths sellotaped.

Philipa said...

Flo - my mother is very blood and sand and gave me 'the speech' too. This was about a fortnight after surgery when I was made to get out of bed and go in the garage whereon my father gave me a shelf unit to hold. It ripped the surgery apart (it was grab it or have it fall on my legs) and I was rushed back in, hemorrhaging, but they couldn't operate again then. I had to have further surgery but by then my parents alloted brokered help was up and I was alone and caring for two children. I have never recovered. Sometimes being told to 'pull yourself together and get on with it' is just stupid.

In the 70's my sister and her husband parted. They were not rich and were renting. It was impossible for her to get a rental agreement at that time, even though she was working, without my father going guarantor. It was simply not done then for a woman to be independant - have a rental or credit agreement. That is what the womens movement was about and to equal such things as giving us a vote, equal pay for equal work etc. So that women afterwards could not notice the difference in their lives and could simply be themselves.

Anonymous said...

Blimey!! Calm down dears its only an advert..

The main problem in discussing this kind of issue is that it comes down to tens of millions of individual choices made by people.. and public policy is largely ignored or ineffective anyway.

Anonymous said...

Sometimes being told to 'pull yourself together and get on with it' is just stupid. (Philipa)


I totally agree with you, Philipa, of course those with acute health problems, severe chronic health problems or recovering from surgery deserve help and not to be bullied as you were.

A friend of mine with such disabling arthritis that she has to strap her legs and use a wheelchair was humiliated and frightened when she was called in for a benefits interview to investigate how she might be 'assisted' to find work. I'm totally opposed to such money grabbing bullying of people who are incapacitated.

There are, however, a range of chronic health problems and disabilties which are not not barriers to work - and which don't require positive discrimination in order for those affected to get jobs, in particular if they've been trained and have specific skills.

I know of a blind bloke who has a very high flown career and who got the job because he's good at it, not because of any positive discrimination on his behalf.

Newmania said...

Mutley I think that is very deep , honestly

Fascinating copmment Flo and Phillipa I read it all a few times.

Newmania said...

Yes Flo I think heling people with disabilties is a very different subject to positively disciminating on behalf of women. people need access and then to be allowed to sink or swim

Philipa said...

Flo, Newms - I agree completely. I fear that the changes being made to tighten up on Incapacity benefit will in fact prevent genuine cases from much needed benefits as liars will always lie a little more. I too am against 'positive discrimination' as it seems to assume success can't be had on a level playing field. But of course, as Mutley reminds us, how can you legislate against peoples hearts, personal prejudices and individual decisions? Deep indeed, Mutley.

lilith said...

Jordan is great. Put her in charge.

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