Monday, January 07, 2008

Dale Is Hamilton-Miller

I`ve said it before I `ll say it again. Tara Hamilton-Miller is Iain Dale . Perhaps you are not a New Statesman reader. Infuriatingly it is infinitely better than the Spectator which is a very stuffy old institution but if you are , Tara’s intriguing gossipy column is a highlight In case there was any remaining doubt about her/his identity consider this tantalising tit bit on gorgeous Nadine Dorries the inspirational and utterly shaggable blonde Tory heroine .
Tara`s Top Tory`s
Nadine Dorries -
Though best known for her cult blog, Dorries , one of Westminster’s hardest working MP`s , is cutting down on posting her thoughts for 2008, to focus on various bills close to her heart. Highlight for some in 2007 was her showdown in the members tearoom with employment Minister , Caroline Flint . A witness claims Flint fled like a “bad -cat loser” before any Elnet duel kicked off. This one is never dull

The Evidence

1 It sounds like Iain dale
2 Caroline Flint when to the same university as Iain Dale and he debated against her .I would guess he resents that she ( a bimbo clothes-horse) is a cabinet minister, and he is not, so he would love this story
3 She is not best known for her blog except to bloggers she is well known for her recent stand on abortion in which she claimed that figures produced by the government were misleading .
4 Who but Iain dale would know what her plans for her blog were this year ?
5 How much would it appeal, to Iain Dale`s sense of humour to invent the 'nom de plume ', Tara Hamilton-Miller ? A lot
6 Who else who could do such a good Tory gossip column ? Seriously
Tara Hamilton-Miller and Dale are one and the same . I rest my case , and he may as well abandon the Scarlet Pimpernel routine now


Compose Your Own Insult For Gordon Brown
Simple but in a very deep way satisfying . Pure..... and with an appropriate Scottish accent !

Good Will Triumph Over Evil

Goody; Boris has errupted into life with a super new web site ,not that I ever doubted him. What a wonderful thing it would be for London to get some relief from the scourge of Livingstone and what a tremendous help to David Cameron.I have a vision , it is of Boris armed with the largest individual electoral mandate in the country ushering in a new golden age . It will be as if Yellow maned Aslan had finally slain the Snow ken ( er queen.. ok its a reach )Bells will joyously ring out the end of miserable bendy bus shaped class warfare and the City will call out to the country to unite behind David Cameron with new hopeful way forward for the country....why not ? Go Boris

Selling To The Weak

Forgetfulness. A gift of God bestowed upon debtors in compensation for their destitution of conscience. Author: Ambrose Bierce

'The Church of England has launched a campaign to advise people in debt. It includes a post-Christmas "debt check", with ten points which act as warning signs that people may be spending more than they can afford' - The BBC Website. The marketing phrase 'The lord Jesus Christ can help you consolidate all your debts into one easy monthly repayment' is surely just around the corner.It appears jesus died not only to pay for our sins but to help out with our new TV as well.

What a guy !

Gay Taxi Drivers...

Don`t get many do you and heres why...
. 'Gay men navigate in a similar fashion to women, according to research that offers fresh evidence for a heavy biological influence over sexual orientation. Homosexual men and heterosexual women share a poor sense of direction compared with heterosexual men, and are more likely to rely on landmarks, scientists have found' - The Times.
If I ever do meet a gay taxi driver I expect to hear something like this
" Bloody foreigners come over here and ..they`re all bloody gorgeous ..makes me sick...( moan moan)... oh dear, any idea where we are ? " There were 11 out gays at the last Olympics out of about 15,000 competitors by the way.(Prospect)

Sorry Gays , just teasing

Boaden Beats Her Own World Record

Well you can`t teach an old dog new tricks and the BBC is a very mangy old mutt indeed. Perhaps the most irritating flea on the back of the aforesaid canine is Helen Boaden.. Auntie’s director of news quite clearly detests the Conservative Party and seeks to discredit them by her warped presentation at every turn.
Over the weekend Conservative ideas to clean out the Augean Stables Labour have made out of welfare were blushingly unveiled. In particular the national joke called ‘incapacity benefit or in the vernacular ... ‘lying’. Now you might think the first person to express an opinion might be ...oo I don`t know .... David Cameron? Ah yes but that is because you are not a trained journalist entrusted with the tax payers money and vested with a responsibility to produce impartial coverage.
With her infinitively superior sagacity Ms Boaden swerved such tired conventions and went straight to the opinion of Peter Hain who of course called it “ ‘Unfunded , plagiarised and ..”so on.. How a plan to get people of benefits can be unfunded is something of a mystery although the allegation of plagiarising is not. After Labour’s pantomimic prat-fall over Inheritance tax , they are clearly getting their retaliation in first .You could scarcely hear the Conservative ideas above the babble of complaining charity representatives, funded , no doubt, by the government . I sat hardly able to believe my ears that so soon after the disgraceful BBC hatchet job on John Redwood, Boaden was once again performing like a coiffured circus poodle for the benefit of her kindly master Mr. Brown.
The last time she did this she was obliged to apologise thanks to the efforts if Iain Dale to expose the corrupted standards of the Beeb but even then , she tried to wriggle out of it .She issued a partial apology but denied a suggestion by Dale that the coverage had begin with the words “ The Labour Party has today criticised ..” by giving a list of examples to demolish his flimsy case.. Technically she had a point but in reality she did not . Private Eye reported that the examples she picked DID contain Labour Party criticism in the first twenty seconds and quoted each in full. Th fact that she was prepared to slither along with an "economical " verion of the truth shows better than the original crime how little she can be trusted

I believe she has beaten her own world record for getting Labour Party criticism into a Conservative announcement. C0ngratulations Helen . I cannot say how much I admire you I only want to knowwhat you have been promised. Access , like Andrew Marr ? News , or is ot good old fashioned money in the form of some sinecure like so many other Beeb grovellers.

Sunday, January 06, 2008

The Local MP Is Still National

Our aging crusty MP is a character about whom I am slightly conflicted. He has done some tremendous work exposing the way New Labour burn our money , on the other hand , he has all the silliness of the usual Liberal in an especially virulent form. The local Paper operate a sort of fanzine for him and I suspect there is a strong personal relationship. Anyway some members of UKIP claimed that a controversial incinerator was down to the Euro -fiends .He replied that the EU only made requirement about moving from landfill . I was struck by the fact that in a year of the issue being kicked around, only UKIP brought up the fact it was not a free descision at all. I did not , therefore , feel his conceited description of them as ‘unhinged’ should go unanswered. So this is my latest effort to get into the Express …thus far they have have been immune to my charms …bastards

'I am not a member of the UK Independence Party but I found myself underlining Norman Baker’s description of them as ”unhinged “ and writing the word “irony”. Whilst he may have all sorts of interesting ideas about what the EU`s stipulations require from us on waste, it will be news to many that we live in a world where unelected foreign bureaucrats have any say in our choices at all. It will puzzle yet more that an MP so conspicuously concerned with transparency graft and local decision making should be a member of Party devoted to completing a corrupt internationalist project to eradicate independent states ,and accountability .
These contradictions are all too typical of Mr. Baker, whose much mocked parallel career in investigative journalism has earned him the name Lewes`s Miss Marple . As a member if the left wing Beveridge group he is a supporter of high tax policies. He nonetheless skips around unearthing the arrogant disregard for the taxpayers money inevitable in the dinosaur scale big state he recommends .He is not alone in having concerns about our grandiose commitments abroad but to confuse our friendship with the US with handing over our right decide upon our foreign policy at all, as the EU would like , is ..what was the word ..“unhinged” .
There is no doubt a place for such ”radicalism” as there is anti hunt campaigning and the bizarre conspiracy theories which have upset poor Professor Kelly`s relatives .Personally I would say it was a either a sixth form debating society of the late 70s or a pub.
Lewes is not , as he would like to pretend , an unimportant place with no need to concern itself with the in-coherence of his position. It is a swing seat and therefore in the front line in the battle to remove the tired authoritarian Scottish raj of Gordon Brown . We are heading towards a general election where two views of our future are before us .It is far from clear to me that a vote for our charmingly eccentric incumbent is not a vote wasted or worse still a vote for the status quo. Quite why anyone calling themselves Liberal would want to do that is another contradiction Lewesians might like to ponder. '

...but then UKIP votes have exactly the same effect.

Friday, January 04, 2008

Fuzzy Fidelity

What is the dominant religion in Britain today , Robert Piggott , the BBC religious affairs correspondent has an answer. It is not , as you would expect, outright secularism, and certainly not atheism. Far from it , the default position of the majority is what he calls “Fuzzy Fidelity” .He has the research to back it up taken from the Cathie centre for Census and Survey Research in Manchester. The attitudes to religion that predominate can be summarised by the following statements : “A mild dose of it is good for you “ ,“It is a social good “ “I believe something .. sometimes” .
A large group have renounced organised religion but are unwilling to abandon their connection to the Church entirely . They attend seasonal services and rites of passage celebrations but with such determination that a cynical explanation grows less plausible. The group is highly various , some are weak deists, others undecided, some cling to a residual “small voice"; yet more are merely unhappy with materialism. A full 72% of people at the last census identified themselves as Christian and this incontrovertible fact cannot be massaged into non existence .
Professor Linda Woodhead at Lancaster University sees this tenacity in terms of an identity crisis. If we are not white Christians then we are ..what ? . Dr. Abby Day claims to have discovered a growing identification of Church going with sorts of middleclass aspiration, which I find far fetched . The “Damascean” conversion which strikes as ones children approach school age is well documented elsewhere of course. Intriguingly, it has been suggested that it is fashionable , once more , to be religious.If there is an ephemerality to the current “vogue “ that may explain why the Churches voice is not uniformly stronger on moral issues .I think I detect a growing interest in Christian derived morality as it relates to abortion , but I am speaking for myself .
Professor Voas who conducted the research claims we are at staging post on the way to full secularism . I do not agree ….I cannot exactly tell you why but I feel a wind blowing in a new direction . I notice an increased interest in our own history and its Chistian elemements .

I happened to be watching a programme in which a long haired but in fact achingly traditional Cof E Vicar from nearby looked at Zen Buddhism . It was first of a series in which he will taste-test exotic disciplines in search of the usual nebulous rewards. It was by no means as bad as it sounds, but it occurred to me that the BBC have missed a tremendous opportunity. Think of the audience for a "History of the Church of England" . Its intellectual ferment , its martyrs, its virile confidence and glorious works from Donne to St.Pauls to the the Book of Commons Prayer. All this lurks behind the jumble sales and apologetic vicars of today. What a riveting story it would make.
We seem to have reached an impasse ,faith will not die but cannot find a resting place . I just have a feeling that we will start to reappraise our own heritage as the first and best place to look for answers .
Economic and Social Research Council Publication “ Britain in 2008”

Muslims Back Livingstone,,2234453,00.html

Boris fans do report immediately to his Grace`s abode wherein he deals magisterially with the jumped up and self styled “Community Leaders” in question. Archbishop Cramner is on the blog roll but I am sure his fame precedes him. I cannot add anything to his fine words ...

There May Be Trouble Ahead.....

Alex Brummer has a gloomy piece in the New Statesman today about the turbulent economic conditions ahead . His point is that we are approaching a perfect storm in which a number of problem will hit our shores simultaneously . The trade deficit with the Asian economies , the final accounting for the $300 billion of sub prime debt only $100 billion of which has thus far been written down by the banking sector , the housing market slump and our perilously high level of borrowing .
What to do ? Inflationary pressures on food and energy will make large interest cuts an “exciting “prospect and more immediately the collapse of tax revenues as the financial sector in particular takes a beating all bode ill .A Keynesian solution of increasing the size e of the government sector is constrained by the promise to hold public sector growth to 1.7% .Denied .In the first 8 months of the fiscal year we have borrowed £36.2 billion the total is certain to exceed the £38 billion borrowed in2006/7 so the largely fictional golden rule is likely to show mysterious signs of rust once again.

I like this comment :
“ Unless the Chancellor is prepared to dispense with the fiscal rules his predecessor put in place he will be weapon less in the battle to avoid recession.”

I somehow cannot see the glove puppet Darling blaming his predecessor , can you ?Brummer also predicts the first Sterling crisis since 1992 , and given the political fallout of that , still virulent today, a collective shiver must surely be running up the New Labour spine. For Conservatives we can face the music but (quietly ) dance ...

French balls

This blog is getting a bit sex obsessed isn’t it but I could not resist this .Little Napoleon , Nicolas Sarkozy, currently squiring the mouth-watering ex model Carla Bruni around the sights of Egypt , has been under pressure about his disgraceful penchant for beautiful women .His reply displays what I believe they call ‘panache’ ..
For 12 years they were used to having granny and grandpa ( Jacques Chirac and his wife Estelle) at the Elysee. I have new style. Everyone is going to have to adapt . Now the French have a real man at the Elysee who has balls and uses them”
(Canard Enchaine )

Well my jaw dropped , can you imagine we that listless cadaver Brown saying such a thing , or , to be fair, any British Prime minister ? Still with Palmerston and Lloyd George in the back catalogue whilst we may not talk the talk we certainly walk the walk

Thursday, January 03, 2008

Britain 2008

I have requested Mr. Dales help with the following which was probably foolish ...I wonder if anyone knows anything about ESRC, thats the "Economic and Social Research Council"

At any rate,this is what I asked : "I bought the above ( Britain in 2008) today and it is consistently slanted to a centre left position, from the discsussion of devolution, to the fact that crime is actually going down and so on. It makes the Labour Party`s case in the sort of subtle way the BBC did in the 90s especially .Its the choice of subjects ands the treatment ,together with the presentation of stats .They are funded by £180 mio of public money under John Denham`s ,Department for Innovation, Universities and Skills .
In effect then, the Labour Party is distributing high class propoganda at our expense . You have probably read it and I wondered if you though it was worth asking questions about . Its like reading the Guardian say. Nothing wrong with that, I often do ,but presented as impartial observation and funded by the tax payer .... it winds me up!"

It is here:

You can go straight through the the source of funding and then behind that John Denham busy fighting the Conservatives by fair means in Southampton. Is it just me or is this outrageous ? I `m really not sure , noone else seems to mind .
( ., wrote the Devolution bit )

Sex In 2050.....

People will be having sex with robots by 2050, an artificial intelligence expert has predicted.David Levy's book Love And Sex With Robots: The Evolution Of Human-Robot Relationships claims robots will become so lifelike that they will be hard to distinguish from real people.The 62-year-old, also a chess master, writes in his book: "Great sex on tap for everyone, 24/7. What's not to like?"Robot technology is advancing hugely across the world, with Japan in particular making great strides towards robots which can help out in homes or hospitals. Mr Levy also believes that relationships with robots may not just be about sex - people may end up marrying them as well.(Sky News)

Well , I have for an very long time demanded that the boffins stop all their genome and computer what-not and devote all their resources to the development of the pleasure –bot. It looks as though the “Weird Science” message is finally getting through but marry them ? Is that wise ?
I have been looking though the Economic and Research Council Britain 2008 and it troubles me . Nobel prize wining economist Gary Becker has an influential explanation of divorce suggesting that marriages without a specific task allocation are far more likely to fail. The traditional bread winner and’ ironing sex toy’, arrangement would seem to be ideal then . So far so good .
Wendy Sigle –Rushton of the Gender Equality Network ( impartiality assured ...), however, says that this trend is due to the double burden of earning and house work women find themselves in when they work . Her research shows than when men take on domestic chores the rate of divorce comes back down to the normal level.
I `ve got a horrible vision of the “Pleasure –bot” reading Cosmopolitan with a cocktail while I do the dusting .

Tri -via

Tri via means three intersecting roads where people met to exchange gossip

Poor old Nicholas Soames who , in my view , is very far from a buffoon , is nonetheless treated to that description after some inadvisable quad bike high-jinks involving children in a trailer on the public highway. He was following the New Year hunt and of course the Daily Mirror has leapt upon him like a snarling hound . I did enjoy his reaction .."Those f*****s the hunt monitors are always out to get us in any way possible - and it's a coup to get a Tory MP."Not very diplomatic is it but you do recognize the feeling . I could be reasonable about this and chat about the pros and cons or I could just tell you to fuck off. Today I `m going with option B.

Did you know thatBernard Manning worked as security guard in Berlin’s Spandau prison watching over aging Nazis ...yes that’s right aging Nazis. Underline and write the word irony ..I know he is dead but so are they. ( BBC)
Incidentally there is great resistance in Germany to the smoking ban partly because such a draconian measure was last imposed by,.......Adolf Hitler . True and no surprise really. (Born the same day as Charlie Chaplin...honestly )

Great letter in the DT mentioning some facts Herr Braun might like to take into account when he decides who he will allowed to live in the light of his terrifying new lifetsyle plan. Those groups who make disproportionately large demands on the NHS include the following
1 Women
2 Poor People
3 Ethnic minorities
4 Unmarried men as compared to married men
As a white middleclass married males can I expect = to have the best of everything in the Brave New NHS our psychotic leader is trying to impose on us ? I somehow doubt it ..

Old News reheated this very morning tells us that England will shortly overtake Holland as the most densely populated European Country . It is already four times as crowded as France and this is mostly due to the torrents of immigration flooding onto the unprotected SE plains . Population was the apocalypse before climate change and similarly dire predictions were made .New ice ages including Polar Bears skidding good naturedly along the frozen Severn Estuary ( Nationwide), seemed on the cards and the George Moonbats of this word might like to notice how wrong the population doom-mongers were .
“There's been fretting at the prospect of the UK population swelling to 71 million by 2031. But big surges have been predicted before and they haven't always been right.
In 1965 the government's demographers and statisticians projected that the population in 2001 would be 75 million.
They were wrong. It was 58,789,194 on census day in 2001.”
That roughly accords with my estimation of the exaggerations of the professional panic brigade . Population and climate change are well worth watching but the excitable shrieking is not helpful.

Wednesday, January 02, 2008

Oh Christ I`m Related To Harriet Harman

Even I occasionally find the words ,“Little Englander”, forming soundlessly on my desiccated lips . So called ‘foreign correspondents’ ,if the exist at all, do their job, reading the local Press, from London, so we were never going to get insightful; coverage of the Bhutto assassination . Ironically , however, even the implications for our “Small Island “ feel phoned in.
Did Gordon brown “articulate the feeling of us all"..or not …. Its almost as if that mystifying phenomenon of soap opera reportage had spilled into serious news. This isn’t real you want to shout , this is like…. “Wrestling “.( ITV used to beat BBC armed only with that be-spangled tosh despite the Beeb monopolising priceless Franchises from the FA Cup to Wimbledon.)
Better still has been the collective curled lip turned towards the quasi dynastic succession of (dead meat ) Bilawal . Dominic Sandbrook in the Standard got the joke . Breezing through the Chamberlains and the Churchills,of course, he alights on a new dynasty, the “Prescotts “ . It appears young David who did so nicely out of his planning permission contacts , with his Development Company, is bidding to follow his father as an MP for Hull. As Conan Doyle said “Where there is no imagination there is no horror” Unfortunately I can just about imagine it .
The nature of contemporary British nepotism is easy to miss .Cavendishes and Cecils were dominant clans of the Victorian period and as late as the 1950s Harold Macmillan’s government included 35 of his own relatives. Ah yes but we have moved on ,we murmur contentedly , but have we ?Peter Mandelsohn is the grandson of Herbert Morrison, Loony Benn and son…we know , Baroness Jay is the daughter in law of Jim Callaghan , Frances Maude and Nicholas Soames and David Heathcote Armory are their father`s sons, but this is the misleading tip of the iceberg. To get a better idea have a look at the 1997 intake . Nineteen of these were the children of MP`s but turn the magnification up on the famous Blair-babes ,and you can see the typically close familial links common to the political class
The Blair babes
Hilary Armstrong represented the same seat in Durham as her father had held before her. The Potteries MP Llin Golding sat for a seat formerly held by her husband . Her father had been a Labour MP for 30 years . Irene Adams sat for Paisley South, another seat held by her husband. Charlotte Atkins , the Staffordshire MP was the daughter of 1960s firebrand Ron Atkins. Estelle Morris was an MP`s daughter . Dari Taylor of Stockton South had grown up the daughter of the MP for Burnley. Gwyneth Dunwoody , then on her first quarter century, had been married to an MP, and her father Morgan Phillips, was General Secretary of the Labour Party.
Fiona Mac Taggart of Slough had grandparents in parliament .Ann keen , in Brentford, had a husband Alan, who represented the next door constituency of Feltham, and a sister , Sylvia Heal, who was the MP for Halesowen. Bridget Prentice , ( Lewisham East), had been married o the MP for Pendle. Julie Morgan( Cardiff North) was married to the MP for Cardiff West. Angela Eagle , ( Wallasey ) had a twin sister Maria sitting for one of the Liverpool seats ..and so on and on it goes ….
The Others
The Conservative picture looks little more meritocratic but Julie Kirk bride ,Virginia Bottomley and Ann Witherton were all married to MP`s. Ann Cryer (Keighley) deserves special mention.. She was elected to a seat once held by her husband, gave birth to Hornchurch MP John Cryer who entered in the same intake, following both parents into “Public service “ The Liberals are a little better still, but Asquiths married Bonham Carters whose son whose daughter married Joe Grimmond so they too have their Blue blood.
Interestingly it is in the Labour Party that the bloodline and family seem to be most necessary ……perhaps because they do not value merit ? No doubt the encyclopaedic Iain Dale could spend happy hours bringing you up to date on the intricate rivulets of connection between the whole lot of them , but I think the point is made …..
Cheri Blair of course comes from the Booths and her Great Great Great Grandfather's Brother's son is John Wilkes Booth the Man who shot US President Abraham Lincoln.Coo..Harriet Harmanisation is a near relative of Lord Longford and guess what, my Auntie looked us up and we are related to him as well. Harriet Harman is therefore related to me …….. Pass me the pearl handled pistol please .

Tuesday, January 01, 2008

Are You A Communitarian ?

Julian Baggini
Ranciere “ The line between hatred of populism and hatred of democracy is thin and often unwittingly transgressed “…yes and often wittingly as well says Newmania thinking of Europe. Interesting that Julian Baggini recently used the quote though and telling about the usefulness and limitations of his attitudes….aha Who is Julian Baggini …read on ? ..
I first noticed him when his book , ‘Welcome To Every town’, was reviewed by Nick Coen in the New Statesman.. My initial impression was of a chancer trying it on . He set out , he said , to explain “ordinary people” to the “intelligentsia ". To this end he went to live in Rotherham for 6 months , foreswore the Today Programme and the Guardian, switching to Radio 2, The Sun and The Daily Mail .
You don’t know whether to laugh or spit . To claim to be so delicate a hot house flower that you assume the posture Brian Sewell might adopt on the Rugby pitch, in your own coutry ? Implausible . I lived in his home patch , Islington, at the time, and well knew what a mixed place it was. I was also was once married to a Rotherham girl and simply did not recognise the separation between the two . He appeared conceited and ignorant but above all a ridiculous character .Imagine pint sized Gulliver peering at supposedly miniscule Liliiputians who are in fact the same size as him.
Whatever he may be however, what I shall treat as a literary artifice, has yielded some useful language .So leaving the preposterous faux-squeamishness aside, then , what was it he discovered ?

Most of the English still live within five miles of where they were born. The culture is overwhelmingly associated with place in a way entirely misunderstood by the ‘Universal Value Liberals ’.Many answers to Polls are contradictory .People say free speech freedom ,are essential to their identity but a majority are quick to want such freedoms prescribed for Muslims for example .Fair play is admired, but in the form of the Human Rights Act it is paradoxically loathed although the act only enshrines rights more or less enjoyed by the British anyway. The paradox is resolved in the concept of Communitarianism .

The Liberal believes you have rights as a member of the human race the Communitarian English , to some extent , believe you have rights only as a member of club having pulled your weight and discharged the responsibilities associated with that place which is your home or country. Rights and values are particular and derived from tradition , history and place . The Liberal post enlightenment idea of universal rights is in competition with this older idea . A communitarian , for example , would be happy that values associated with the countryside , say an enjoyment of fox hunting, can be legitimately different to those associated with towns . It would be less enthusiastic on imposing universal values hence the hostility to the Human Rights Act.
The Liberal / Communitarian divide, cuts across politics abd right through the heart of the Liberal Party.The unions defended their “Communities” with the miners strike . They dislike outsourcing to cheaper countries to the detriment of those others. Other left wingers encourage mass immigration and deplore little England nationalist attitudes . Conservatism has many elements of Comunitariansim in it but the Laissez Fair economics associated with Thatcher are inimical to communities. Personally I have never accepted that idea of Margaret Thatcher but you take the point . Liberals are intensely localist but their internationalist policies are aimed at the destruction of such loyalties.
My belief is that cowed by the superficial intellectualism universal Liberalism many people are unable to articulate their equally respectable communitarian views and this sort of language will be important . What Baggini does not see is that he is himself part of a ‘community’ and his values have no claim to be imposed universally except his own unquestioned belief that they are better. Perhaps I should go and live amongst them and write a book about their picturesque dried tomato eating habits, and quaint ideas ?

Dirty Paddick

What is it with Liberals, the cannot see a belt without hitting below it can they . The friendly “Conversation “ of the leadership election quickly turned into a bitchy playground slanging match thinly disguised as a civilised discussion, and all the more excruciating for it . Like spraying deodorant on the cat litter instead of changing it .
Now listen to the painful snippiness of mayoral no hoper Brian Paddick on Boris Johnson. I assume he is trying to catch onto the blond ones trousers to get noticed at all but what a peevish snide gimp he shows himself to be. He calls Boris a “Clown” and claims he is being herded about in silence by Tory minders . His appeal says 'dirty Paddock " is based on making jokes about others "....yawn,. "We need a serious ambassador for London to be our Mayor - not a clown“. Paddock went on , suggesting implausibly that Boris ` current estrangement from his good friend as Monsieur Vin et Madame Bier was due to his being unable to control himself after a glass or two. I love the pusillanimous reference to the Compass smear ;”There have been accusations about him being a racist and a sexist…“Well Brian are you making such allegations ? No ? Thought not , stop lying then you weasel.
People like Paddock don’t get it do they. He who pontificates is not he who is serious and a proper apprehension of the world seeks a balance through humour and proportion ,not self aggrandising portentous drivel. We have had one of those and the English will , I hope, never abandon their instinctive mistrust of the canting bore. Boris played it with a straight bat “ People want to hear from candidates what they are going to do about policing , transport , housing and the Olympics . They don’t want to hear bitching …”Quite , its an embarrassment that he should have to say so.
With one candidate a 1970s hard left gangster taking London back to the Liverpool of the 80s with his pack of bullying Municipal swill suckers . One candidate a sulking child Boris could be made of wood and still be the best option for London. As it is he has a lot to offer both in promoting the City abroad and in standing up to the overmighty state for this energetic theatrical and trading City.

Boris Johnson is London in all its glorious imperfect perfection . Paddock is a craven Hyena to frightened to approach the Leonine beast except by cowardly yips from a safe distance .

Out With The Old

I have been browsing in the dying vegetation, at the edge of the News River, in search of the zeitgeist . I can do little better than this quote ..
“BBC1 Headline “ Another schoolboy shot dead. Police to hold urgent talks Talks?

The Dummy upon which I once practiced my kiss of life, has been replaced in Whitwick Leics .The subject is now called ‘Fat Fred’ and has a 46 inch waist .As an obese dummy he is reckoned more likely to resemble the dying party . A gang of internet perverts who plotted to rape and kill two young sisters were jailed for 27 years last year( Sun 6.2.07). The same edition featured Girl’s Allowed in St. Trinians outfits on the flimsy pretext of the then rumoured remake. Zeitgeist ?

Very dead Queen Cleopatra was revealed to have been a dead ringer for Les Dawson when a coin bearing her "Two bag" image , some 2000 years old, was discovered by Newcastle sleuths . Another altered image was Michael Foot , inexplicably still alive at 93. He had a relationship in 1971, with a 24 year old girl ,when he was 58. According to Kenneth Morgan`s recent biography Mrs. Foot`s became suspicious when he started to tidy up his Cat Weasel appearance .
“Face Book” sounds sort of contemporary does`t it ? Not necessarily;a book published in 1606, about Gunpowder plotter Henry Garnett’s execution, was bound in his own skin and ,apparently, a recognisable image of his face can be discerned . Face book geddit ? ( Wilkinson’s Auctioneer’s South Yorks ) . Paul Kelly was killed on new Years day last year in Bath and clues as to the identity of his killer subsequently appeared in verse form on lampposts .“The truth is there like an open grave “…..Herbert Powel knifed and battered his wife to death at the age of 88. Its Roald Dahl come to life is it not
There was such a lot of fake death as well . Canoe man of course but what about the approval given by the CIA to water boarding .The tortured man believes himself to be dying due to the reflex reaction to watery asphyxiation. They usually crack in 14 seconds.. Glenda Askew 47 from Swansea feigned her own death to avoid a £60 speeding ticket . Sounds like a plan to me ( both of them.)
Death plunges included the Tate Gallery man with his mysterious mobile phone call, and the co-founder of the world`s biggest on line dating agency, Gary Frisch(38). He “plunged “ from his Battersea flat. Yvonne De Carlo the cadaverous vamp of Munster’s fame shuffled of this mortal coil, and I will miss John Inman .He came out late in life having previously said he was “Married to the Business called Show “. Speaking of shows, Albert Lynch ,suffering from cancer , organised his own wake only to be taken two weeks early . The party went ahead as planned .So many people are gone and yet little of it affects me .

Odd things shock you. The description of the airborne cull of wild horses in Australia in which many die in agony, after slaughter on an unimaginable scale . Last year the rate at which British troops in Afghanistan were dying or seriously injured was higher than during the Second World War . Perhaps it is better not to hold these two thoughts in your head at once ,The death of the Chestnut tree outside Ann Franks hiding place, and from which she drew comfort, seemed strangely sad. It reminded us of the inhumanity people are capable of .

A four year old boy dashed into a burning building and lost his life trying to save his father ( Ryan Mchale of Carlisle) ......So , not only our with the old but on some tragic occasions out with the young as well. Just the other day the 26th London child was shot this year.

Stability and Change

As we know the Polls were gyrating like copulating Gerbils last year and judging from the New Year messages of the protagonists have been panicked into the most basic sort of politicking. Cameron is all “New hope” and Brown is all ..“Unbending determination “ . If this ping and pong keeps up I may well get back into music and football. How much dumber the whole thing is going to get… perhaps this dumb
DC-“You iz so over mate “
GB_“ I am so not over mate “
DC-“ Yeah right the right honourable Gentleman is rinsed he is rank man “
GB-“Your mum , mate , . I `m buzzin , isn’t it , I `m mint ,proper nang aii “
DC-“Yadda yadda yadda , Talk to the hand co` the face is in in Spain”
Whereupon the speaker will intervened with a cry of “Order “ Keep it real you iz plastic mate”. And a sulky murmur comes from the chastened leaders on the front benches

Things can only get better..

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